A Day in the Life

6:00 am --- Hear baby stirring. Say a solemn and earnest prayer she will go back to sleep.

6:02 am --- Realize God has a sense on humor he is sharing with YOU. Pray again-- more earnest than before. Throw in some if-then statements. If the baby sleeps in today, then I will definitely say morning prayers!!

6:05 am --- Morning prayers are out of the question.

6:15 am --- Feed baby bottle (still hoping she will go back to sleep)

6:30 am --- Greet toddler. Not like the sleep-deprived monster that you feel, but the sweet nurturing mom that you fake. (at least this early in the morning)

7:00 am --- Holy Cow I gotta pee. Door open to keep an eye on the kids!

7:30 am --- Breakfast
7:32 am --- Wipe dropped spoonful of cereal from floor
7:34 am --- Wipe dropped spoonful of cereal from floor
7:36 am --- Wipe dropped spoonful of cereal from floor
7:37 am --- Wipe dropped spoonful of cereal from floor
7:39 am --- Wipe dropped spoonful of cereal from floor
7:40 am --- resign yourself to mop the floor later- you know when you have more time.

8:00 am --- Curious George--- need I say more. (This keeps one busy while you play with the baby)

8:30 am --- Good-bye Daddy. Blow kisses from the window
8:31 am --- Reassure toddler that Daddy will be back from work later

9:00 am --- Wrestle with toddler to get him to hold still long enough to change diaper and dress him properly. Pin all extremities of baby in order to change her diaper and dress her.

9:20 am --- Make a list of everything you want to get done today.

9:30 am --- Bottle for baby.

9:45 am ---Put her down for nap.

9:46 am --- Throw in a load of laundry

9:50 am --- Add Laundry to list and cross it off

10:00 am --- Yard and garden work while toddler plays

10:05 am --- Yell across yard for son to get fingers away from vicious dogs next door

11:00 am--- Baby's up. Fight with toddler over who gets to go get her. Give in, let him get her today

12:00 pm --- LUNCH

12:12 pm --- Tell the boy to eat more than the bread off his sandwich.

12:20 pm --- Plead with the boy to eat more than the bread of his sandwich.

12:40 pm--- Realize the boy is not going to eat more than the bread of his sandwich and give up the fight. Clean up

12:45 pm --- Say a prayer that the boy will go down for a nap today

1:00 pm --- Run any errands. Errands can be no longer than 1.5 hours of duration and cannot be longer than a 10 minute drive. If either of the above rules are broken kids grow little horns and turn into demons.

2:45 pm--- Baby bottle, nap. Put movie on for toddler for "quiet time".

3:30 pm --- Your Faith in God is reaffirmed! Say a quick "thank-you" prayer that the boy is finally asleep.

3:31 pm --- Do dishes as fast as you can, so as to prolong (or even GET) personal time

4:15 pm --- Dishes done. Whip out a Blog post.

4:20 pm --- Hear groans of baby waking up. Ignore them while you finish your post.

4:30 pm--- Go to baby. Pick her up. Love her. Kiss her. Appreciate that she will not be a baby forever. Think about dinner.

5:00 pm --- Start dinner. Think about waking up boy. Prolong it as long as possible. (we don't want cranky boy syndrome in the house tonight.)

5:30 pm --- Wake up boy, Greet daddy with kisses

6:00 pm --- Dinner

7:00 pm --- Bath-time

7:30 pm --- Baby bottle, bed.

8:00 pm --- Boy bed.

8:10 pm --- Put boy back in bed
8:12 pm --- Put boy back in bed
8:15 pm --- Put boy back in bed
8:21 pm --- Put boy back in bed. Tell him next time you turn off the lamp.
8:23 pm --- Turn off the Lamp
8:24 pm --- He turns it back on, but doesn't come out anymore.

8:30 pm --- Watch a television show or try to spend some quality time with husband. You may realize this is not going to happen... especially if the T.V. is on.

10:00 pm --- Go check on toddler boy and enjoy that he is peaceful and calm and beautiful when he sleeps. Remember this for tomorrow. Kiss his rosy little cheek a million times. Cry because you love him so much, because you love THEM so much.

10:30 pm --- Brush and floss teeth while watching the opening act of Leno.

10:40 pm --- This time is tricky. Try to finish getting ready for bed and turn off Leno after opening monologue, but before you get sucked in for the guests.
10:45 pm --- Try to ward off a frisky husband

10:50 pm --- Tell your husband you're serious that the only action he is getting tonight will be in his dreams and that next time he needs to start a little earlier so your not so tired.

10:55 pm--- Assure husband you love him and it's not a flat rejection, just a rain check for a better time (but seriously earlier next time).

11:00 pm --- Realize you never mopped the floor. Take a few minutes and feel guilty. Resign yourself to do it tomorrow. You know, when you have more time!!

Well, here you have it folks. For all those CURIOUS minds out there, I just knew you wanted to know all about my days.
The mystery is solved...